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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Ana In Me's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, April 30th, 2009
10:17 pm
Anyone here have MSN and wanna talk about your ED or whatever? Add me, lilian_mayer_23@hotmail.com
Saturday, April 18th, 2009
4:22 pm
What Am I Doing Wrong?
I am eating nothing most of the time. But I have put on 4-5 pounds recently and my tummy looks flabby.

I chew and spit stuff like bread in the morning and noodles, cereal, chocolate late at night - I've been doing this forever and it's never caused me to gain weight. Even if I accidentally swallow a tiny amount, I don't think I could swallow enough to make me gain THAT much, right?

Recently for no obvious reasons at all, I put on that weight and I'm now severely depressed. Should I stop chewing and spitting?  And what else can I do to lose those 5 pounds?

Somebody PLEASE help me! :-(
Sunday, November 12th, 2006
1:47 pm
Tuesday, September 26th, 2006
6:47 am
GRATED CHEESE OR PESTO????????????????????????
I know this is a bit early to be thinking about dinner but what do you think (I have to choose one between the two or my mum with completely flip...):

pasta and grated cheese

pasta and pesto

Amounts are fine cause I can make it myself but if I just have plain pasta I know her eyes will gogle and she'll bring me yogurt and fruit and coclate and homemade cake........... NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Current Mood: CHEESE OR PESTO...grr...
Tuesday, May 30th, 2006
4:37 pm
my metabolism
hey evry1. I need advice. I don't want my metabolism 2 slow down. Whats the best way 2 keep it good?? Would eatin different calorie amounts each day work e.g day1-300, day 2- 600, day3- 400, day 4- 800, day 5- 300 etc ....

love u all

Current Mood: thoughtful
4:33 pm
Hello evy1. I dont want my metabolism 2 slow down. wats the best way 2 keep it quick?? If i eat different calorie amounts each day will tha help?? e.g day 1-300, day 2-800, day 3- 500, day 4-100, day 5 - 200 etc...

love me xxxxx
Wednesday, March 1st, 2006
11:40 am
Hey, I'm new to this community. I'm 117lb and really needs some tips for losing weight for the summer. I prefer fasting to binging but I don't really care how I do it as long as I can lose some weight. Is anybody interested in having a diet buddy? My goal weight is 98lb.
Emily xxx

Current Mood: determined
Thursday, November 24th, 2005
12:45 pm
Saturday, September 24th, 2005
1:12 pm
JOIN: narcotic___
Monday, August 29th, 2005
4:02 pm
Saturday, August 13th, 2005
3:42 am
Thursday, July 21st, 2005
8:12 pm
Tuesday, July 19th, 2005
12:31 am
Hmmm.... Starting Over
I'm new here and I hope to make somenew friends and reach my goals and dreams...

I've decided to go back to my Anorexic ways.... I feel free when I do, as werid and messed up as that sounds...

Breakfast: 1 cup of coke (100)

Then I got on the computer, and for some odd reason went back to the sites I use to visit and a few new ones...

Lunch: Peach Jello (80), Skim Milk (80)

Snack: 1/2 serving of Milk Chocolate Pudding (80)

I was bored, and had a craving for something sweet, so I made somejello and pudding (jello, with it's gelitin[sp?] has benifits to help your hips and knees, as well as other joints) Before I could get carried away on the pudding, I reminded myself of my goals and was able to throw it away when my uncle wasn't looking. Then I figured out a way to have pudding safely. 1) Offer most of it to the family; 2) We have this itty-bitty little cup things that have lids. I fill them up with pudding (and this is like, 1/10 of a serving, or along those lines) and keep them until I have a craving for something sweet, then have a taste or two of the pudding.

Dinner: TV Dinner (210), Milk (80)

Total Calories: 630

Not too bad... Maybe tomorrow I'll be abole to stay under 500.... Wednesday I don't plan to eat much b/c it's the day that marks a year of my relationship with my boyfriend. :) So I'll plan on a little bit before my dance class, to get my metabolism going, and then have dance class to burn it off (Hip Hop), and then I'll choose carefully wherever my boyfriend and I go for dinner. :)

Rose Fire

Current Mood: curious
Thursday, July 7th, 2005
1:43 pm
startin ... again
Hello everyone. I have posted maybe two times and decided to give some background information in hopes to find a friend or two in my shoes or close.

Name: Cece
Location: California
Current Weight: 157 (gross)
Lowest Weight: 115
Highest Weight: 185
Ed: Ana with a touch of Mia
I have been Ana for about 10 years. I recovered for about a year and gained a million lbs. I tried "the right way" to lose it but that was hopeless. I am back on track and hoping to find some people like me becuase noone else could understand.

Today I have had - coffee with fat free milk and splenda and a 1/4 of fruit salad.

Current Mood: determined
Friday, July 1st, 2005
12:00 am
Hello, I just joined this group last night, but didn't have the time to post anything. So, I just thought to say hi.
I also thought to add the poem about Ana, that I wrote the other day. So here it is...

That’s all I want to be

She had me in her arms,
And she was promising love.
A love no one else could offer;
A special kind of love.

She coved all of me.
I needed her,
I wanted her,
I loved her.

What am I to do?
I do not have control.
What do I choose?
Me, or her?

I know she is not real,
But I was dressed in all of her.
Wrapped up tightly,
Covered from head to toe.

To scared to look in the mirror.
To scared to step on the scale.
Covered in clothes that do not fit.
Bones sticking out, all over my torso.

This is what I wanted,
And this is what I got.
All this trouble,
For a little bit of love.

I don’t know what to do.
I can not stop.
Underneath in skin,
Is where I rot.

It’s building up inside of me.
There’s a power over me.
She has control now;
Not me.

This is my shame.
This is my pain.
But now that I have her,
I can not let go.

She is everything to me.
My love,
My life,
My hope.

She is wrapped around me.
I am wrapped around her.
Together we will fight.
Every single night.

I have her,
And she has me.
That’s all I want to be.

Current Mood: blank
Tuesday, June 28th, 2005
8:42 am
Day 2
Hopefully today will be better than yesterday! I ate last night and still feel awfull about it. Is there anyone out there that needs a level of support in this like me?
Wednesday, May 4th, 2005
1:54 pm

Join fixmymirror now! We are a new community for any eating disorder, and are in need of new members!
Sunday, March 6th, 2005
2:38 pm
The thought of girls looking at you and thinking "I wish I was her"
is desiring...
The thought of guys looking at you and thinking "I want her"
is tempting...
The thought of walking by a person looking at you and thinking "she should be a model
is a dream...
The thought of being skinny
is tempting, desiring, and a dream*

I cant wait until I'm skinny im so excited... For the past few days i've been on a water diet but i ruined it yesterday when I drank juice...alot of juice...i feel like i gained a pound >.<, I'm soooo mad at myself. Starting today I'm going to start my water diet again for as long as i can last (atleast for 2 weeks. I'm SO dizzy, SO pale, SO cold, but yet.....SO FAT

Current Mood: I Can Do This*
Saturday, December 18th, 2004
9:14 am
Thursday, December 2nd, 2004
5:46 pm
Eating Disorders Research
Hey everyone, Id like to introduce myself. My name is Lindsay and Im 22, a graduate from SUNY Fredonia. I will be going on to grad school in Fall 2005 and in the meantime I want to do some research. I will be going on to school for social work to study eating disorders. I am in the very early stages of putting together a lengthy survey that I plan to turn into a book (before I return to school).
This is where all of you come in. I would like to know if any of you would be interested in taking a survey such as this. It would be completely confidential (you would give only me personal info. for my record-keeping). This is going to be looked over by a lawyer before I send it out, so it will be very legit. The questions range from demographics (name, age, sex etc.)- personal data such as names would not be disclosed, to questions about your personal struggle, media influence, mental health background etc. I believe I am qualified to do research like this because I have struggled with an eating disorder for years, I feel like I have a non-judgemental outlook and the ability to ask questions that maybe haven't been asked before.
This is a rather non-personal email (sorry) that I intend to send to as many of these eating disorder based livejournal groups as possible. That is because I need help from all of YOU. If you are interested- email me
Please keep in mind that I am in the beginning stages and although I want to move the processes along quickly, it may take time before I am able to send the finalized survey out. If you email me, I will try my best to respond in a timely fashion and answer any questions you may have.
Thank you so much, Lindsay
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